Saturday, 5 July 2014

I've Lost My Mojo!

I've been writing only in dribs and drabs for the past month. Even when I came up with an interesting idea for a short story, the spark failed to ignite. It's waiting in the wings, like a hopeful understudy. I once read that writer's block indicates either a problem with the material, or a problem with the writer. I'm not sure whether or not I should be pleased that the problem is definitely me!

I've been feeling more depressed. Don't get me wrong; I'm nowhere near the depths of my worst episodes of depression. I just feel empty and less motivated. I'm doing my best to ride it out and do things that help, like exercising and focusing on other stuff, but it's still difficult. That's one of the most annoying things about depression and the hardest to understand: even when you've experienced worse in the past, you feel like you can't fight through the fog of your current depression.

I honestly do feel like I've lost my mojo. Plus saying 'I've lost my mojo' in an Austin Powers mockney accent makes me smile! I'm not sure how to get it back, but I'm trying to figure it out. In the meantime, I'm nearing the end of my bookkeeping course, so I'm focusing on completing my end-of-course assessment rather than my writing. Nothing involving numbers comes easily to me (except sudoku, but that's really just logic), so wish me luck!

6 comments:

  1. There was plenty of Mojo in your post Hayley, sometimes you think you've lost it but really it's just lurking in the wings because you've got too much on your plate! Sounds like you need to concentrate on your book keeping course and once that's complete you will be able to apply 100% to your writing. I'm another one for taking too much on and then burning out but we live and learn. Never could get my head around Suduko though, maybe because I'm lacking the logic gene :-)

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  2. I think it's more a question of needing a break sometimes, perhaps. I can't seem to settle to new writing either at the moment, partly because I'm getting ready to go to the RNA conference, so I'm using some of the time to get everything organised here and catch up on bits and pieces. Give yourself a break from creativity and finish your course first and you'll be eager to get back to writing eventually.

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  3. When I felt as if a short story was going nowhere, I took a break from it. When I went back to it, it began to take shape. That was encouraging, so I kept working on it, but only when I felt inspired. Eventually, the story was shortlisted, then published in a prestigious competition anthology. It only reached that peak because I worked on it in stages, one step at a time, whenever I felt like it. That's all you can do with writing - or life in general - when things aren't coming together so well. Just take on what you can and all the small steps will add up in the end. And with that handy reference to numbers, good luck with the course! x

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Joanna. I will *try* to bear this in mind! :-)

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